Time Warp Tuesday: April

Let’s do the Time Warp again!

Welcome to the thirtieth installment of my blog hop/writing exercise called Time Warp Tuesday!

For those not familiar with Time Warp Tuesdays, which I host on the 2nd Tuesday of every month, here is the background of how and why I came up with the idea. If you are here to participate and link up, you can do so with the Linky Tools at the end of this post (or if you have any difficulty, you can share the link to your post in the comment section).

The gist of Time Warp Tuesday is to revisit and share some of our favorite blog entries from our archives and reflect on our journeys since we wrote them.

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The theme for this month’s Time Warp Tuesday is: April

April represents the beginning of the second quarter of each New Year, it is filled with rainy days and all things blooming. Some years Easter and Passover fall in April, bringing forth important and special events in many faith traditions. Choose a post from your archives that you wrote during the month of April. It can be about any thing or topic that speaks to you. Then write a new post on your blog about why you chose the post that you did and what has happened in your life since.

Participants can write about whatever you want in your new blog entries. However, for those who might have needed some help and inspiration to get started, here are some questions to consider:

Why did you pick this post? Has your perspective changed since the day you wrote your original post? Do you think you would still feel the same way if you were writing your post today? What have you learned about yourself, your family and your life since you wrote your original post?

Note: If you have an idea for a future Time Warp topic, theme and/or writing prompt, please feel free to share it in the comment section or send me an email. If I choose to use your idea, I will give you credit and link to your blog that week.

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Time Warp Tuesday: April

For most of my life April was not a very significant month in my life, so much so that I noticed and commented to family and friends over the years about how I didn’t know anyone that I was close to who was born in April and wondered if there would ever be an important event that might take place then. I even mentioned to a few people after Sean was born (in October) about having a feeling, maybe even a premonition, that someday I would have a child, possibly our first daughter, that would be born in the month April.

What I never anticipated or imagined was that though our second child/our first daughter would be born in April, that she would also die not long after her birth. Because of this April has become a very important month for me every year, as it reminds me of our very special baby girl Molly, who came into our lives and passed away on April 17th, 2008.

I also began blogging six years ago tomorrow, on April 10, 2007, so in addition to reminiscing about our journey with Molly every year in April, I often find myself thinking about my experience writing and sharing blog entries here since then.

Five years ago today, on April 9, 2008, I wrote a game changing post, sharing the news of our baby girl Molly’s impending birth and death, though at the time we did not know which would come first:

It Won’t Be Long Now

I also shared the same post on our CarePage in three parts, as back then there was a character limit and so I often had to break up my long updates into multiple posts. This is Part 3 of the CarePage Version, which includes the comments. It has been a long time since I read the comments on both my blog entry and my CarePage update and re-reading them was as moving for me as revisiting my own words from that painful time in our life.

Five years later it is surreal and sad for me to return to what I was thinking and how I was feeling as we prepared to meet and say goodbye to our second child/first daughter. Like so many things in life, when I reflect on our experience with Molly in some ways it seems like her birth and death happened so long ago and at the same time there are memories I have which feel as if they took place just yesterday. As devastating as it was to know that our baby girl was going to die not long after I wrote that post, I do recall Bob and I also feeling a sense of relief, as I wrote about back then:

We do feel some sense of relief that the end of this roller coaster ride, that we have been on for almost 17 weeks now since we first found out there was something wrong with Molly’s heart (her heart rate was much lower than it should be), is in sight. We do feel blessed to have had time to connect with our daughter, especially me being able to feel her move inside me so much. However, we are exhausted from the journey and in many ways feel ready for God to take Molly to Heaven. We did explain to Sean at dinner tonight, to the best of our ability, the latest news about his baby sister. We think he understands that she will die very soon and we told him that I would be going to the hospital to deliver her and that after she is born, he can come and see her, hold her and give her the teddy bear he picked out for her if he wants to. He said that he wants to do all those things and seems to have a healthy grasp, as much as a four year old could, on what is happening. We have talked about how she will be our special angel in Heaven after she dies and that we can talk to her and think about her anytime we want. Sean seems to like that idea.

Next week we will celebrate Molly’s 5th Heavenly Birthday on Wednesday, April 17th. It’s hard to believe it has been five years since I carried Molly, she was born, died and we buried her. I look forward to the opportunity to continue our tradition of having mass said for her that morning at our parish church, followed by visiting her grave at the cemetery and then enjoying a meal with a small gathering of loved ones.

I shared in a blog entry last week, as we mark this five-year milestone, I am also finding a lot of peace, comfort and inspiration this year through working on a special project in Molly’s honor and memory, called Team Caring Connection. Finding ways to give back and pay it forward really helps me as I continue to grieve, heal and learn to live without having Molly in our life. Five years is a long time, but  I still think about, remember and miss our Molly-girl every day.

As the flowers and trees begin to bloom, as they do every April, it always brings me back to the days leading up to up Molly’s birth and the weeks that followed her death. I can’t look at a magnolia tree or tulip flowers without calling to mind our baby girl who entered and left this world during this month and season of growth and new beginnings.

Thank you for reading and for doing the Time Warp with me this month! I look forward to your feedback about this post, as well as reading and commenting on all of yours.

Please feel free to comment even if you didn’t write your own Time Warp Tuesday post. It is not too late to participate if you are interested, click here for the details.

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The topic for the next Time Warp Tuesday (on May 14th) is: Cancer

Most every year on Mother’s Day, since not long after I became a mother, I get up early and walk in our neighborhood breast cancer awareness walk in honor of members of our community who have survived breast cancer and those who have died from it. For that reason, I often associate cancer with the month of May. In this day and age it is hard to not have been touched somehow by cancer. Maybe you or someone you know personally has battled some type of cancer. Maybe a love one of yours has survived or sadly, maybe someone close to you has died because they had cancer. Choose a post from your archives in which you talk about cancer. It might be about your personal experience or a more general post about this disease. Then write a new post on your blog about why you chose the post that you did and what has happened in your life since.

Participants can write about whatever you want in your new blog entries. However, for those who might need some help and inspiration to get started, here are some questions to consider:

Why did you pick this post? Has your perspective changed since the day you wrote your original post? Do you think you would still feel the same way if you were writing your post today? What have you learned about yourself, your family and your life since you wrote your original post?

Note: If you have an idea for a future Time Warp topic, theme and/or writing prompt, please feel free to share it in the comment section or send me an email. If I choose to use your idea, I will give you credit and link to your blog that week.

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For those new to Time Warp Tuesday, here is a quick recap of how it works:

1) Browse through your old blog entries to find one that fits the topic for the given month. The topic is shared at the end of the previous month’s “Time Warp Tuesday” post here on my blog (see above for next week’s topic).

2) Write a new blog post in which you introduce, link to and then reflect on your journey since you wrote the older blog post and put it up on your blog on Tuesday. Please include this link https://bereavedandblessed.com/projects-regular-series/time-warp-tuesdays/ in your blog entry, so your readers can find their way to my post with the list of other participants, in case they would like to read more or participate themselves.

3) Share the link to your new post here on Tuesday and then visit, read and comment on the other blogs.

4) After you have done all of these things, you are welcome to grab the code for the Time Warp Tuesday button by clicking here and put it on your blog. The link will take you to a Google Doc where you can copy the code. If your browser does not allow access to your computer’s clipboard, you can use Ctrl-C for Copy and Ctrl-V for Paste, or use your browser’s Edit menu.

5) Check back here on the 2nd Tuesday of the month to find out the new topic, theme or question for the next Time Warp Tuesday (I welcome your ideas and suggestions) and then return to Step 1 of this recap to participate. Please let me know if you have any questions and I hope to see you back here next month: Tuesday, May 14th (the 2nd Tuesday of the month), when we’ll “do the time warp again!”

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Thank you again for reading, commenting and participating in my Time Warp Tuesday blog hop. Link up below and click through to visit others who are doing the Time Warp! (If you have any trouble with Linky Tools, please share the link to your blog entry in the comment section. Also, please don’t forget to comment on my post here, as I do not have a link to this (my own) post below, but I would still really appreciate your feedback. xoxo

1. Lavender Luz

2. April revisited

3. Life Accd. John